Everything is amazing and no one is happy

With Thanksgiving coming up I thought I would share this video. We have come a long way baby.

You are sitting in a chair in the sky!

Better late then never...

It has been requested that I share some pictures of my gobblins decked out in their halloween goodness. I dare not let down my followers, especially since this request came from the beloved mother of my husband.

So now as we creep up on Thanksgiving jump back in time and imagine running into these guys on a dark fall night.

Elise wanted to be a vampire. If you notice the blood dripping from her mouth and a pesky spider that is climbing up her face.

Trevor, well I am not sure what this is. I think he was calling it a phantom. He swore it was from a movie. Not any movie I have ever seen--but then again I have never seen any of the "scarey" slasher films out there. Scream was the scariest, not Nightmare on Elm Street or any of the Jason movie. I am a big scaredy cat.

Then we have a sweet kitty cat to round out the costumes. Love that she had no interest in scaring anyone!

We ended up with too much of this! Must hide it, now. Pants are getting tighter on some of us.

no excuses...

I realized as I was looking over my pathetic excuse for a blog that I only posted four times in the entire month of October. How are you all keeping this lively and interesting. Me, well I am stumped.

Life was so much easier when my Mother in Law was the only one who read my blog. If I had nothing, I would just throw a few pictures of the littlekins up and she would be happy.

black sheep

We all have that one relative that pushes the envelope a little, wouldn't you agree? The one people tilt their head to one side when talking about. Sometime tongue clicking or shaking head motion will follow. I know you understand.

Mine is Grandpa Gus, a surly old fellow that claims he was kicked out of school for eating the books. Lied about his age to join the merchant marines at 15 years old. Tattoos, oh yeah he had bunches before they were even remotely cool. My how I wish I had taken a picture of them... He had a giant eagle on his chest, arms and if I recall it was on his back too. My favorite tattoo of his was a question mark right above his pants waistline. When I asked him why he had chosen that he smirked and told me "so the ladies will ask about it". He married 4 times. Even with his tough exterior he still had a soft touch.

 This picture he carried in his wallet for probably 60 years, his father and him on his motorcycle.


 My Dad bailed him out of jail many a time because he just could not seem to remember not to drive his car after he had been drinking. Drinking, he did far to much of that!

When I was 5 he tricked me into eating his Copenhagen chewing tobacco because it was candy, I am embarrassed to say I fell for that more then once. 

He liked to watch my eyes light up as he would tell me about being stabbed in the mess hall while at sea. Then when I grew and had kids he liked to watch their eyes light up too.

He died a couple years ago after living a hard life, he lived longer then I think any of us thought he would. In the end he stayed with my family for a period of time. My, how my kids loved having Grandpa Gus here. He watched the Discovery channel all day, was always looking for a cookie or candy, and believed no one made better coffee then Hills Brothers.

One day he finished off a jar of the kids Gummi Vitamins because he thought they were candy...Dementia, yeah he had that too. He spoke Swedish like his mother before him and loved teaching us the Swedish words for things in the house. Not all rated G either words either.

One little quirk he had was ketchup on everything... the only things he said he would not use it on was cantaloupe and ice cream.

Why do I write this today, so I do not forget him. Remember your crazy, push the envelope relatives, don't let their memory disappear. They are part of the fabric of you. He is the stuff stories are written about. He lived his life on his terms. I am really nothing like him other then the fact that I tend to put BBQ sauce on much of what I eat. I still love to think about him though and what kind of life he lived.

She only plays a doctor on tv people

Do you think it is an advertising "intentional" that someone many of us recognize as a Medical Doctor on TV is the voice of a campaign claiming medicinal benefits to eating yogurt?

I spent the entire commercial thinking is that her?...no it isn't... yes, I think it is...no, they do not think we are that dumb to associate her as the voice of brilliant medical advice.

I cannot even tell you for sure what the brand was, so I guess in that vein the ad was not completely successful.  I can say that it was her, and she says yogurt is good for you though.  Feel free to buy any brand though, cause I am not sure who she works for.

I imagine it has some psychological brain/pocketbook link they are headed after in the 30 something female age group.

Am I overthinking this? Maybe she just needs a little extra cash cause making $200,000 per episode is cutting it a little close to the bottom line? Just maybe?

I&$#%*&#$(&@#($&#(@Q$&(@#*

Starting to sweat because it is 11 weeks till the big day!

11 weeks till I have to pull all the stops out and make it memorable.

11 weeks till Santa comes down my tiny chimney and  fills the stocking with magical fun!

What are you secrets? How are you going to go BIG without breaking the bank? How are you going to convince your little ones it is magic without missing a mortgage payment. We have been fortunate to pay cash for the holidays the last few years. I hope and pray we can pull it off again.

Tips people, now I am asking for tips! How to get the biggest bang for your buck. 

these tennis shoes taste terrible

How many times have we said something and then wished we had the capability to travel back in time 45 seconds and resist the urge to spew such stupid words from our mouths. Face it, it happens to all of us. Like the time the first time I kissed a boy and felt the urge to say "I love you" even though I probably only liked him, a lot.  Like the time someone asks you if something makes them look fat. They asked the question, they already know the answer or they would not ask. Don't take the bait, stay out of it.

I work as a travel nurse. Always in a different place. Never time to click with the other staff because I live in my car like an out of work dot.com worker. Yesterday, I worked somewhere I have not worked in about 5 months. Staff has rolled over, as it often does in my line of work.

As I was sitting at my desk for a moment trying to catch up on my charts I got drug into a conversation. A conversation I wish I had stayed out of it, because it resulted in eating my tennis shoes.

Nurse 1: I am feeling really hot. All of a sudden I have a headache too.

Nurse 2: Maybe, you are pregnant.

Nurse 1: Hmm, I could be. It is possible that I might be pregnant.

Myself: (totally felt compelled to interact here) Really, do you think you are pregnant? How exciting. (trying to be upbeat for Nurse 1)

Nurse 2: (LAUGHING NOW)

Myself: What, why is that funny?

Nurse 1: because I am 9 months pregnant.

Myself: melting into my chair and probably 5 shades of red darker. Praying that somebody will need CPR right now so I could escape.

What do you say in that situation?

"Oooops, my bad. I just thought you were fat."

Laughing and saying nothing was about all I could think to do.

There is no way to recover from that one, is there? Wish me luck, because tomorrow I have to go back there and pretend none of it ever happened. I will know God still loves me if she goes into labor tonight.

It's not like she did anything anyways, she is 9 months pregnant. That totally explains why she sat around answering the phone all day.

P.S. I totally could not have gotten away with the "golly gee, no way I would have never guessed, you just don't look it".

how many is too many?

Last night while I was reading emails my daughter was watching HGTV.

Anyhow, somehow she saw a commercial for the TV show "Twenty years and twenty Duggars." A biography about the Duggar family who in 20 years have increased their family size to 20 people. I believe that is including the 2 parents but I also heard a rumor their is another baby and now a grand baby on the way.

Well, as she is watching this commercial, out of her sweet little 10 year old mouth, what do I hear...

"They need to get a hobby."

She nailed it, huh? She has no clue why I found her wisdom so damn funny. 

 At some point you have to find something else to do with your free time!

Not now Jim, let's play scrabble.

Are we alone? Is this a little beyond the "let's have a big family" line of thinking? If I had had my way I might have had a couple more curtain climbers but when you are creeping up to 20 kids wouldn't you want to start sneaking birth control pills in with the prenatal vitamins?

I'm just sayin'

play dates

Today as my son walked in the house after school he had a request.

Not wondering what he could have for a snack or if he could play wii.

Nope, my sweet 3rd grader wanted to invite a friend over to play, tomorrow. After determining tomorrow would not work but picking another day that would work. I asked who he wanted to come play. Expecting to hear any number of boys names, I was a little surprised to hear a girls name fall from his mouth. He also wanted to make sure his twin sister would not be able to "hi-jack" his play date. Then came the kicker... "can she spend the night?' Poor little love, he has no idea why his crazy Mom thinks it is not appropriate for his friend to sleep on his top bunk and have pancakes with us in the morning. So sweet and innocent -- that is going to change someday, isn't it? The word play will get dropped from "play-date" then he will just be dating. The playing will also no longer include legos and Nintendo games.

No rush my little man! No rush!

If you have read my blog for any length of time you may remember this... 

This is not a completely new request.

and yes it is the same girl.

eavesdropping like a good mother should

As I sit here reading a couple blogs I am eavesdropping. Shhh, I do not think they know I am listening.

The neighbor girl, a 7th grader, is telling my daughter when she grows up she is going to be a "ghost hunter". She is heard saying that she will move to Rhode Island and hunt spooky things. Her parents told her that she will need to go to college just in case the ghost huntin' thing does not work out.

Now to think about it, I do not recall seeing Ghost hunting classes on my college class list. I think her career choice might have something to do with watching this show.

Heck, I would be a ghost hunter if I could look like her when I did it. I wonder if cleavage helps hone in on the spirits?

new moon?

Movie Trailers - Movies Blog

Will you see it? Bella annoys me and Edward is a little too anemic looking for my taste, but yes I will see it.

Deep Fried what?

Saturday we went to the County fair and saw what there is to see. Our County is a large diverse population of hip suburban folks, rural country folk, and then there is a bunch you may see that look like they just may have pulled up in their van they live in "down by the river". (Anytime I can throw a Chris Farley in there makes me smile a little.)

It is a short one, enjoy!

So back to the fair. You have all been, I am sure, but I thought I would share something we saw. Makes me wonder if this is an American thing or if other parts of the world have the same fascination with deep fat fryers.

I will share a closer look at the menu. 

I asked the kid behind the counter what his favorite menu items were. He said he loves the fried Twinkies for Breakfast and the Krispy Creme Chicken sandwich for lunch and dinner. Yummers, huh? 315 cholesterol reading at the age of 20, maybe?  

 My Nephew could not resist, he is 13. An age that begs to be just a little bit adventurous. They happened to be out of the deep fried alligator, so he had a deep fried twinkie. He let me have a bite, it tasted like a donut, but don't tell him that. That is far too boring!

pushing up daisies

Excuse my absence but I have been the victim of a crime. Senseless and sticky . The "perp", well the name was Jones. He left me alone and without a means to reach out for help. As I now struggle to scrub the chalk outline from my life, I finally am able to put my story to computer screen.

You see it was a day much like today, well it nearly was today, it was Sunday. A lovely day, a day people love to just enjoy. That is exactly what was happening until Jones came along. One of my "Littles", as my dear friend Linda likes to call her children, was attempting to answer the corded telephone that resides next to our cherished and loved Mac computer. In their haste, a glass holding a Sour Apple JONES Soda was deposited on the keyboard of the computer. FOR SHAME!

Rather then rush and quickly try to stave off damage a phone conversation ensued. Then said child attempted to leave said mess for someone else...I am sure later "Not me" or "I don't know" was going to be blamed for the carnage. The man of the house loves that computer almost as much as I do though, and I think he smelled his future visitations to The Drudge Report and his fantasy football website were being threatened. Words were said, stomping happened, we thought things would be ok-- until an attempt was made to resuscitate type something...anything. The keyboard is dead, the mouse, while she appears to be on life support at the moment. I am afraid at any moment I will need to quickly plan a double funeral.

Monday I visited some of the blogs I could get to without typing anything. Simply using my poor, sick mouse for selfish reasons. I know, I am a deplorable human being. The challenge came when the kids wanted to cook something specific and I needed a recipe to use as the framework. It was not easy, but using my favorites folder and some fancy clicking they got to eat their Norwegian pancakes that they wanted. I felt like a hero for a moment until I remembered to fall out from that little "Jones" problem. Thank goodness the Man of the House remembered we had an ancient keyboard to at least assist until our replacement moves in. Now the waiting begins.

Now what to do with the old one?

Maybe this?

Or this?

Looks like a Chia keyboard to me.

It seems wrong that as I sit here using my Apple computer that the keyboard I am using says Microsoft on the right corner. Thanks Bill, for bailing me out. Damn you deliciously good Sour Apple Jones Soda. I was just commenting how good you would be with a splash of vodka! A marriage made in soda heaven.

I forgive you Jones Soda.

blogging Rocks, product reviews come disguised as presents.

Recently I was offered the chance to review Blue Sky Scrubs . No requirements were made that I had to only say nice things-sharing my true opinion was encouraged. As I sit here though, I cannot help but hear my Mother saying, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all". I promise to be honest with y'all, ok.

I am a Nurse, when I am not at home wrangling my kids. Although when I work it seems like a lot of what I do at home -- just MUCH bigger kids. Patients whine, they cry, they occasionally throw tantrums, they lie, they hug. I recently have even seen one of my patients on the cover of a national newspaper for committing a heinous crime. That was quite a surprise with my morning coffee! I think I am safe from the HIPAA police since I did not share the crime or patients name, as much as I wanted too...

Anyhow, comfort in my field is crucial. I kind of feel sorry for those of you that have to wear clothes to work...my work uniform is as comfortable as my pajamas. Seriously. The product I get to review is a new, fancy pair of scrubs. I ordered them and they were on my porch within 2 days. Packaged like a present from your favorite Aunt. Tissue paper, a box with a lid, and embossed card! Gorgeous! A little more then I usually would spend-but also better quality then anything else I own.

See I told you, FANCY!

They even threw in a ponytail scrub hat bonus. Megan offered to model for me.
I like the style. This particular fabric is a little too Amish schoolgirl for me though. They did have tons of great crazy fun fabrics I love though.

I am not sure about the stitching on the pockets though...looks a little like the Christian fish thing to me. On darker fabrics it is pretty prevalent. It works on the light colors though.
Yep, that is a close up of my breast. See the beauty of scrubs...loose and comfy! Totally androgynous, wouldn't you say?

My one complaint besides the fish on the pockets is the lack of pants pockets. I am a hoarder at work. I keep many of my work supplies at arms reach in my cargo pockets of my pants. Scissors, no need to go find them--I got a pair. Mini notebook to jot down something before it leaves my head--yep I got that too. Pens--yep got a few, seems when I put them in my breast pocket they fall out every time I bend over. These pants, unfortunately lack pockets other then the ones that are on my butt. Have you sat on scissors lately? I do not recommend that. I still love them, it just makes them a little less then ideal.

Do to my recent surgery the most action my scrubs have seen is this--
When I do go back to work my Blue Sky Scrubs will fall into rotation nicely.

do I look hysterical to you?

I eluded to the fact that I had spent some time in the hospital recently. I was vague--intentionally. Mainly because I have had narcotics running through my veins and putting any rational thoughts together were... well, beyond my abilities.

So today I sit here, having only had one vicodin with my morning latte. Fairly cognoscente and feeling minimal pain. I thought I would share something I learned in nursing school that is now relevant to me. It involves Greek history in some ways and just how much we have learned over the years.

This might be time when my couple of occasional male readers can the hit the back button and head back to where they came from. They may not find the following facts as funny as those of us with "birthin'" parts.

Interesting tidbit here, the surgery where you remove a woman's uterus is called a hysterectomy a marriage of the word for hysteria and "ectomy" which means to remove. Coincidence? The Greeks and their root words, hysteria is derived from the Greek word for uterus! Seriously.

It seems in the days of old, the uterus was a mysterious thing. When women started to act a bit wacky they referred to that as hysteria or being hysterical. Plato actually believed the uterus was an animal that lived in women only to become pregnant. If it did not become pregnant it could become a rogue assassin traveling around the ladies body making her into a head case or "hysterical".

My how we have progressed.

My little procedure was not done to relieve my hysteria-I will probably have episodes that would make Plato shake his head every once and a while. Endometriosis was a major contributor in my case, it was kicking my ass. I am glad to be starting fresh even though, now when they do a bladder scan, I was told they have to tell the machine I am now a man. I have missing "girl parts"now, you see. Lucky me?! Good thing I do not have any body issues with my little surgery.

Can I share another little root word trivia.

The word orchid comes from the Greek word "orchis", testicle. They named an entire group of flowers after male anatomy! Women are crazy and men are flowers.

Hmmmm... Go figure!

recovery sucks!

I gotta tell you recovering from surgery is no fun!

I am on a self imposed hiatus. Partly because, back in June I thought it would be smart to take a math class this summer...even though I was spending a week camping with boyscouts, a week vacationing with family and then having surgery 10 days before the final was to occur. So now as I hobble about cursing myself and holding my stomach - I also need to study my arse off to try to pass this thing so as to not tank my GPA. It really limits the amount of narcotic cocktails I can serve myself!

Wish me luck. My final is Thursday. I think by Friday I will be back here hollering about something.

-----------------

On a side note, yesterday my other half and I snuck off to watch Julie and Julia...I think I am in love! Now I need to find her books so I can also become a good cook like my favorite good cook! Between her and Julia my family could eat better then we definitely should!

Happy Birthday to my favorite Blogger...

Well she is my MOM, you know. Love ya all-- but without her I would be a nada! I feel blessed beyond words to have the Mom I do.

Stop by and wish her happy birthday!

She deserves a bunch of these today!



And hugs by the millions!


A feast prepared by the greatest chefs in the world!



I will be returning to blogging soon. I recently spent a few days in the hospital and am just not back to my good old self yet! I have missed visiting you all so much! Please excuse me as I am going to take a narcotic cocktail and take a nap! See ya soon!

does this stimulate you?

So, I disappeared on ya. Did ya notice? Probably not... see we had this super secret plan for my Husbands parents 50th Wedding anniversary. It involved a trip down to the Bay Area of California and then a few days at Lake Tahoe. I could not udder a word of it here because occasionally my Ma-in-law pops over and reads about some of my crazy antics. DARN! So I up and left ya, all 5 of you that come here regularly. Thanks for coming back!

Anyhow, while we were in Tahoe we decided a trip to Reno was in order. Play a slot or two, check out this "Hot August Nights" thing going on, walk the streets looking for derelicts to hassle...you know the deal. We took Little Man with us so he would be able to say he had been to Nevada. One more State in his tiny list of places he has been. Something for him to write about when he goes back to school. I imagine, even though we only spent 20 minutes in one casino, it will read something like this.

"For summer vacation I went to Reno and had ice cream while my mom played slots. My Uncle won big money but Mom and Dad only lost their money. I saw a lot of old ladies my Dad said must have been kicked out of the Brothel, whatever that is. They looked like they forgot to put on their bras and needed to brush their teeth."

That my friend, is how you win the Mom of the Year award!

As we were walking I happened across a sign that shows Reno's take on the Stimulus plan might be a little different then Obama's.

Hey, whatever works. Right?

do you know what a miracle looks like?

Let me show you!

Funny how you make friends in the most unreal ways. My blog friend Debbie at Talking Trash has held an actual MIRACLE in her hands, she is her Granddaughter. Sweet baby above Bella could not wait to meet everyone and showed up at the party better then 4 months early. Check her out. There is word on the street that she is actually going to be headed home soon, how lucky for her Mom and Dad.

Part of today's festivities are that I also am supposed to post a baby picture, let me tell you what a heartbreak that is. My computer had a terminal illness in 2006/07 that terminated many of my images...heart breaker I know. Best thing is I have the original subjects so I will just have to figure out how to get them off my old external hard drive. Thank god for that.

The best I can offer you is a baby picture of our dog...crazy huh?! Because let me tell you my babies were darn cute too! Someday I will get those on my computer and make you come look at them, ok?

So if you don't mind I will sip on a pretty pink cocktail and enjoy this "virtual Baby Shower" for the little Preemie-Dona known as Bella!

Want a corona with that prescription?

"Huh?, What are they thinking"

Well, This Time I had my camera so I could share it with others and see if I am just a crackpot or is this weird?

Del is an Doctor of Osteopathic medicine. Wouldn't you think the beer sign and corona flags might take some of his credibility away? Then again you can go to the doctor and have a drink all at the same time!

I do not know. Maybe I have just been spoiled by having my doctors in medical facilities and not bars...I am such a snob that way!

In all fairness to Del, I think he may have a door on the other side of his building, but I am not sure. His observational skills definitely are lacking because his sign is right above the door to a freakin' bar!

Find me Friday

I am partaking in Ali's "Find me Friday". She is the sweetest girl that just lost the most amazing pup in a unfortunate turn of events. My thoughts are with her, funny how we become so attached to our animals. My family suffered a heartbreaking loss a couple weeks ago of the most amazing cat EVER! I think we are just finally starting to hold ourselves together a little more. It sure hurts though.

So back to the point of this post-

So recently we tool a Ferry ride over to the Washington Peninsula to visit the newest cousin in the family! While the ferry was docking we noticed this on the piers.

Can you see what it is?

Look at this one...



or this one...



Yup those anoying birds that try to steal your food as you are having a picnic on the beach. As it turns out baby seagulls are spotted and very cute. This Mama had 3 we could see in her nest.

I am going to share a few more so bare with me, once I started looking I had a few more I wanted to post

Our Gracie Bleu that mysteriously disappeared 2 weeks ago.

Trevor's helmet with Trevor hiding beind it. When I tell you he is da bomb, I mean it!

What a crazy hat Megan is wearing in this picture from a couple summers ago. Looks a little like Davie Crockets raccoon skin hat. But is it a hat, nooooooo.

Nope it is just Aunties Havenese Puppy Jack Jack. All this cuteness and he dances too!

no cake for me, thanks

When I was in nursing school I had a valuable opportunity to visit an actual cadaver lab at the Bastyr College. How amazing it was to see the actual operating system of a real human body. Those images live with me even still. Although not in only positive ways. After that experience I developed a huge intolerance for certain foods. Things that look a little too much like the meat we all carry with us all the time. Certain things I will not eat at all. Other things I can eat-- if I do not prepare it and have to handle the uncooked product. One of my friends from school is a vegetarian even still after that experience.

I am finding I have this thing in my head that once I have a negative image associated with something it is hard to want to ingest it.

Which leads me to this, certainly I cannot be the only one with this idiosyncrasy.

But really, who would make a cake that looks like this?

A kitty litter cake?!

I know it is a cake but I think I would hurl if somebody offered me this as a token of my Birthday celebration. I feel bad posting it on my blog for you to see, but I promise it is a cake...would you eat a piece?

I found this photo on one of my favorite recipe sites All Recipes

But if you want the recipe for this cake just click on the words kitty litter cake below the picture. If you make it--you are sick and disgusting, just so you know! But please take no offense to that because I really tend to like sick and disgusting people, they make me laugh a lot.

Dust yourself and get back on that pony

I previously shared that I had injured myself just a little bit. If your squeamish better leave now! There is no blood but it is a little ugly.

Here is how it happened-

The other half was monkeying around with the little trail/dirt bike he has. Giving the kids rides and having some good old fun! I heard some words of confidence in my riding abilities-mind you before he purchased this bike I never drove anything with two wheels faster then I could peddle! I had boyfriends before with motorcycles but never did more then sit on the back and enjoy the ride.

I gave it a whirl...I was having fun!

I even got up my confidence and went a little faster and further then I have before. I was a natural!

NOT

I would like to travel through time to talk to who ever designed motorcycles.

Why is the throttle right next to the brake?

Because maybe some moron, who has no business sitting her arse on one, might in a moment of panic confuse the two.

It could happen!

When you start to fall you should not have to remember that the gas is next to the brake! I present the proof that I forgot. I would NEVER post a picture of myself in a swimsuit here but with you I will share my road rash!

day 3--love that shade of purple, how about you? Yup, it is giant, I suppose swelling is to be expected. Damn! Knee sprained too-ouch!

Lessons learned

1. Always wear a helmet, I am glad I did not have a headache to go with my limp
2. Throttle is on the right hand grip...oh yeah, the brake is around there somewhere too
3. Fall down far away from the rest of your people, that way no pictures will exist of actual fall-so glad!
4. Make sure the kids see your giant "owies" so next time they have a tiny sliver you can remind them how tough you are-then offer to amputate their foot. That always works!
5. Always get back on one more time after a fall-who wants the last time you did anything be the time you wiped out. I did and am glad-it hurt but I am glad.


** correction: my husband has advised me the brake I was supposed to use was by my right foot. Apparently the one by my hand is a secondary brake for the front wheel. I think his telling me this has now assured I will never ride it again. At least my car only has one brake for me to make it stop! **

Peek-a-boo!

I am taking part in Blessed Country Moms new Friday Peekaboo Friday--Mostly because I injured myself and I need a day to recoup before I join the living... Just wait for the story-it's a doosy! In the mean time enjoy my peek-a-boo picture of my Mega-Moo.